Untitled

I think we are in heaven
You waltz on my symphonies;
You cradle in my lyrics;
Your vision is wrapped around my eyes,
around what they see
and yet it is I who stumbles and falls.
I move over to his shoulder,
and whisper
“I think I will be rich”
and I see myself collecting feathers
of a beautiful bird in my arms.
In my eyes, there are dreams
woven into threads of glass
of beautiful trees;
of colourful fountains;
of stereotypical “starry-nights”.
Yet I sit alone buried under notions of reality
and ask myself
“Why do you see things that never were,
that never will be…?”
I think I remember too much
of what is yet to fall
and I am thinking of falling into your arms
hoping you would catch me.
So would you..?
I can hear your profound silence
while I kneel before you
and I can feel your wrath;
and I shall not even reason;
and you shall not forgive.
I cannot turn around
and give you my word
but know that I love you
with every ounce of breath within me
So would you await my fall,
and catch me
just before I am crushed to pieces?

17 October 2007

Untitled

Where shall we carry these burns and scars my love
when all that is wanted of us is to linger upon our past?

He misses her and cries to the music of her laughter
vividly ricocheted from his memories
and she sways among the oceans of nostalgia
like a torn curtain amidst merciless winds
unseen to him.
He thinks she is alive
and she thinks he died when he strangled himself
with his lies.

I have been buried too many times my love
and each time brings me closer to my God.

I think we knew what stood between our beliefs
and the deeds we committed to avoid them.

She thinks she dreams of gardens and fountains
yet all that she chases is a broken home
and the light that illuminate its walls.

Yes, we shall both pray for each other’s fate.

Undo me my Lord
and the bloodied rain that falls upon me.
where are my sins
and where are my tears?
I do not seem to remember.
All I remember is You
and the agony you make me go through each day.

Undo me.

01-Sept-2007

F A L L

Sway among the curtains of my prayers my love
for I shall await your fall.

I surrendered my heart to you
for it to dwell in yours,
yet you carried it in the palm of your hands.

I fell upon you like a monsoon rain
only to wash away
above the surface of your inert desire.

What shall my heart wear,
in such apathy of your thoughts
where yours could not find
drapery for itself?

Now that my unforgiving vows are buried
under your disdain
you speak of your quest of another spring.

What shall we reap from the ashes of time,
that have sowed seeds of hatred,
and what shall this spring be named after
that carries autumns of my dream?

So fall my love,
and be sure that you shall fall
for no fragment of your past shall cradle you,
but me.

9-August-2007 – 11-Aug-2007

My Favourite Quotes

"A man's very highest moment is, I have no doubt at all, when he kneels in the dust, and beats his breast, and tells all the sins of his life."

"Art is the most intense mode of invidualism that the world has known."

"No great artist ever sees things as they really are. If he did, he would cease to be an artist. "

"Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much. "

"Oscar Wilde"

"I know My God commands, whose power no power resists."

"Sweet are the thoughts that savour of content; The quiet mind is richer than a crown; Sweet are the nights in careless slumber spent; The poor estate scorns fortune's angry frown: Such sweet content, such minds, such sleep, such bliss, Beggars enjoy, when princes oft do miss."

"Robert Greene"

"Not that I have the power to clutch my hand When his fair angels would salute by palm, But for my hand, as unattempted yet, Like a poor beggar, raileth on the rich. Well, whiles I am a beggar, I will rail And say there is no sin but to be rich; And being rich, my virtue then shall be To say there is no vice but beggary."

"William Shakespeare"

Hmm...

Humans...!

We are either only apathic

or Padentic;

the ones who reside in the centre

are dead.

In Colourless Depth...

This really isn't an ideal world

Why do I always make it look like it?
Yes, I embellish it for myself!

Yet I truly am after only a broken house,
while the fuckers enjoy my ideal world!


Fu*k You!

03 July 2007

A Standstill

You lie dead in your grave
and I lie half naked in my confusion

When will it end?

03 July 2007

Title Removed

I wanted to say it to you only
once we stood apart
Isn't this a foolish thought?
Pitty, it came out on paper
only as written words.

03 July 2007

Remorse

When I think of you,
I think of fear
and I think of the terrible unseen
You may appear in disguise one day
and I will not know
I have failed you so many times
yet I persist upon my shortcomings
I am foolishly involved in my mind’s mishaps
My aims are dependent on you
but I make a habit of forgetting you
My future lingers upon your blessings
yet I make a mockery
of what you have bestowed upon me
by committing arrogant deeds
My Lord, forgive me
for I fail so often
I am scared in my own futility
But you have awakened remorse within me
O’ my Lord, now help me do good.

30 June 2007

Tea Party

It was good to speak
about things you have been hiding away
under the table where the teapot stood
fuming up the clouds of its hot tea
Yes it was good to sip through the green tea
and forget about the norms of our sorrows
How divine will it be, to look up at the sky
and see them evaporate
like that green tea of ours
I am sleepless again
brewing up the futile thoughts in my mind
Why do you show me the path
that I could not walk upon?
You play with my foolishness
only to make me wise
You either mock me, or you love me the most
out of all your creation
Yes, I am sleepless again with my weary eyes
that fail to seek past you
and you say “You fail to notice me, Asima”
Do not let me drown within
what does not exist
Oh, but you already have
and I am to devour the wrath of it.

20-June-2007

Untitled

In your voice,
and in your sighs
where it all begins
and ends
Sometimes she wishes
and sometimes she is without hope
Sometimes she is strong
and sometimes she is brought to her knees
Yes, it is in your eyes
and it is in the sound of her silent lips
so precarious
yet so very defined
by the years she has left behind
for the unseen and untold soliloquies of her mind
Yes, it is in the symphonies of your heart
and it is in the whispers of hers (heart)
where it all begins
and ends
a world, a universe, a whole new story
of what you want it to be…
11-June-2007

The much remembered day

I remember where we left...

Notion

The worst feeling of all those good feelings
The notion of being independent
and wanting to depend on you
The mono-syllabic words
and the notion of a million page long conversations
in the middle of my dream and reality
in that unspoken space of time that had paused for a long time
when all you wanted to do was run fast
and I had all the time in the world to spare for you
In my dance of being me and only me,
the notion of me and only me,
and the music of me and only me
No, you didn’t know how beautiful I was going to become
and your frivolous notion of money and fame
that stood between you and I, and that still stands
What a pitty that you have the best of both worlds
and the notion of cold nights and warm sunny days is lost to you
while I revel in the best of both worlds
and I could sing you the songs of both realms, unholy to your thoughts
and oh, the mono-syllabic words of your happiness
and oh, the million page long stories of my happiness
and oh, I dance and dance
because the notion of you and I has ceased to flow.

06-April-2007

When we stood apart

When we stood apart
I knew it was meant to be.
The way she would sway into my arms
and per like a cat, wanting to be wanted
needing to be needed.
My arms used to envelop her entirety
and she would seek shelter in my indifference
hiding under my arms like a homeless child,
yet wanting to escape from what she held dearelsewhere.
She hated me being me,
yet she wanted me.
Was she in love with me?
Or was it the notion of the perfect me
that only her eyes could weave
in their imaginary world.
Yes, I remember…
She wanted to escape
while we made out at the back seat of my car.
She wanted to escape
to the same imaginary world I didn’t want to step in.
Her kisses were passionate, but she was dull.
Her eyes were alive, but she was dead.
And, oh how tightly I held her,
she was my darling.
Yes, it was meant to be,
and that I knew all along
when we walked our separate ways.
It’s sad because
she didn’t (know)…

21 March 2007

Untitled

Cubicles are diminished
and the flags of our forefathers are burnt.
You were only meant to carry a cubicle
because a small person like you
has his pockets filled with money
and nothing else.
You were born to only marvel
on the mystery of big hearts
and the countless people
who reside in them.
Your timeless notions of selflessness
are ricocheted by the doings of others
and your sincerity seeks its destination.
Perhaps another house,
perhaps another sports car,
perhaps another world
of you and only you.
Where do the beats of your heart stop
their selfish rhythm
and start beating again for the others?
I have strived to unravel my thoughts of you
disgusted by your way of indifference.
I have cursed everyday of knowing you
and I have loved the “you” I could have had.
Everyday.
So much, that I have become you.

2nd March 2007